The Only Downer In An Otherwise Great Life

I've been feeling down about my constant lack of a girlfriend, more than ever recently. Probably because I've been quizzed about it a lot and many people can see straight through me. No I've never had a girlfriend in Japan. No I've never had a girlfriend anywhere anytime. I've never so much as kissed a girl or come close. Then the next inevitable question that follows, is there something wrong with me? I don't think so, maybe. I've just always been clueless when it comes to girls. But even the most clueless guys have some luck by the time they hit my age, 32 next month. What would you do if you were in my position? I'd love to get married and have kids, but that's not exactly a reality. It's getting mega depressing when people ask me about it, or likewise when people don't ask because they don't think of me in the same way as nearly everyone else on the planet. What's a boy to do, I really am clueless when it comes to girls.

ただいま

So it finally happened, I returned home to Tokyo after a six month exile in England. But six months is a small price to pay to secure your future, and that's what I've done, I've got the job I want in the bag and all my money problems are far behind me. Money is such a bag of shit, you just want enough so you can do what you want and not worry, which I can and also save a good chunk for the future. Thumbs up! My flight back was uneventful until I came to immigration at Haneda. My name was obviously red flagged on the system, and even though I had a valid work visa I was still asked to wait in a small room, where I waited for 20 agonizing minutes before being told all is good. To say I was happy to out in airport arrivals is an understatement! And here I am back at home, and it's like I've never been away. The day I came back I went out for a quiet beer with a few friends, but it ended up being a big group and a dirty allnighter. Right back on the horse. I love my life in Koenji so much and feel pretty damn lucky to have this awesome group of drunk dickhead mates around me.   Going back to work has been amazing, first meeting the new years kids who are awesome, and then the kids who I'd left started the new year. I'm so happy that they were as happy to see me as I was to see them. It's been like half of my soul was missing when I was away, they mean the world to me, more than the world, I couldn't live without them. So yeah, nice to be back. There's been para, adventures, road trips, romance.... Ok no romance. But basically everything is just as I left it but even better, and I will never ever take it for granted! I filmed the next Starfire DVD which will be out at the next Starfire. I was really happy with this one, for the first time I danced like I do normally and wasn't a bit nervous, think I've got the hang of this filming thing now, call me a pro ;) I feel like a para celeb in the clubs since I've come back. Comments like 'where were you on the last DVD I was looking forward to seeing you'. And 'your my Parapara idol', from random people I've never met. What a joke. But yeah, I'm awesome. Loads of adventures I could write about but I'll start after the weekend which will be filled with balls out onsen's and matsuri's.